Katawa Shoujo is a visual novel where you are a confused apparently over excited teenage boy named Hisao who gets asked out by Random Girl Number One in a snowy forest. The "game" opens with Hisao just bitching about the cold weather. Anyhow, Random Girl Number One, or Iwanako, asks him out, and he takes a few minutes to reflect on this one thing before having a goddamn heart attack! You read right. The visual novel basically wants you depressed from the beginning.
And so, there is a timelapse, a brief examination of everything Hisao sees and feels and smells and shits in the hospital, and the doctor somewhat forces him to go to a new school for the disabled, for he has a heart condition that could very well easily kill him if he so much as gets a boner.
So, he arrives at Yamaku, the stereotypically giant looking Japanese school that actually only seems to have two classrooms and a library. Besides that, you meet along the way a lesbian chick named Misha (Sorry. Spoiler Alert) and her love interest Shizune. She also is Shizune's only hope for communication, considering they have a secret sign language code thing I don't know how the fuck they created and no one else knows. Oh yeah. Misha's hair has drills.
Seriously.
Oh yeah. Misha is lesbian, remember, so you cannot have sex with her.
So, two other people you can attract into your white van are a blind tall blonde (try saying that five times fast) and her socially awkward and just plain odd best friend Hanako. She stammers through the whole fucking game...I mean visual novel, so you better get used to it. Lastly, you have the high armless girl of Rin and the boisterous childlike legless runner named Emi. Being the pedophile I am, I went for Emi's route.
After a few thousand runs with her because the nurse (who is a dude and equally as much of a pedophile as I am) calls you fat, you end up dating and having anal sex in a toolshed. Yeeeeah...
Then it gets all emotionally fucked up and Hisao gets too clingy but the sad music plays and they all live happily ever after after some more sexual intercouse. Sex solves everything!
Now, before you call me a porn addict, I'd like to point out you can disable sex scenes, and therefore I just know what happens from Hisao's extremely long talks with himself around every corner.
But in all honesty, if you want to sit back and bawl a little bit, I suggest Katawa Shoujo. It is free, it is heartwarming, it has plenty of hentai, and it is nine hours long....FUCKING NINE HOURS
Jay rates this an 9.2/10
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